Missing You Today...Valentine's Day

I pour through photos almost in an attempt to 'find' him.  I need to 'see' him.  I know...but this is the mind on grief.  It can be pretty unsettling. When I find them, post them, then come back latter and see them...I cry. Doesn't make any sense to me...not a whole lot makes sense anymore.  The panic in my stomach has been almost a constant the past few days.  I am encouraged to cry until there is no more...feels never ending.  Crying hurts and is exhausting.  This is one of my favorite images...so for my 'first' Valentine's Day this one makes as much sense to me as anything.  I don't know but each day without him seems harder rather than easier.